Feel More Love, Have More Pleasure NOW

Whether your single or blissfully in a relationship, or somewhere in between, there is always room in life for more love and more pleasure. Activating and creating more loving and pleasurable feelings is something we can take steps to create.

Here’s how:

When you want to feel more love you can consciously do it by actively releasing the hormone oxytocin into your brain. Known as the “bonding” chemical, oxytocin is really good for you. According to love master Dr. John Gray, women need to constantly rebuild their “oxytocin” levels. Oxytocin is the bonding hormone essential for women in their ability to give and receive love.

Taking time for mani-pedi’s, getting your hair done, receiving massages, taking long, warm bubble baths, listening to music, dancing, walking in nature, a quiet cup of tea, a perfect piece of chocolate (or your favorite treat)….these are a few ways to add pleasure to your daily life that also rebuild oxytocin.

Oxytocin can be generated lots of ways and the more you have the better you will feel. Not surprisingly, it plays a big role in producing orgasms.

Stress is one of the main reasons we become depleted in oxytocin so taking simple steps to rebuild it is necessary to maintain a happy, healthy lifestyle.

It’s well known that a simple hug, gazing into the eyes of someone you care about or petting your dog or cat will also boost your oxytocin level. And, going shopping also does the trick. Even if you don’t buy anything, just looking and touching beautiful items makes a difference.

There is a tremendous amount of new research out that proves the importance of having pleasure in our lives. When we are relaxed and in the flow, it’s a zillion times easier to access (and send out) our positive emotions.

Another benefit of high oxytocin levels includes keeping your weight down.
Researchers have observed that oxytocin and oxytocin rec

eptor-deficient mice become obese later in life – and with normal food intake. Scientists who have given oxytocin-deficient obese mice oxytocin infusions, saw their weight return back to normal levels. The mice also showed a reduced glucose intolerance and insulin resistance. This clearly suggests an alternative option for those struggling to keep the weight off.

My personal “pleasure recipe” includes a daily bath with aromatherapy, an early morning walk with my husband, and one-on-one time with my cat Felix. If I have a particularly stressful day, I have a special CD of favorite dance tunes that I crank up in my office and I dance and sing (all by myself) until I feel the endorphins surging through me.

If consciously adding pleasure to your daily life doesn’t come naturally to you, I would suggest a little experiment: For the next 7 days, decide to add at least 15-20 minutes of pleasure…all for you. By taking the time to add pleasure to your life you will be calmer, happier, and more receptive to enjoying and attracting love at every level.

And, as you create your To-Do list, put YOU on the top of that list, then let me know what happens!

Remember what you put your attention on grows. Add more pleasure and oxytocin to your brain and your life to add more love on every level.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,



Proof that there is LOVE for you!

The #1 key to success when manifesting anything is knowing and trusting that what you desire is really possible for you!

And…sometimes we need to really search for signs, symbols or proof that what we desire is in our realm of possibility.

For those of you stuck in “doubt” that big, juicy, awesome soulmate love can be yours, let me rock your world!

We recently went to see the film, The Theory of Everything about the life of physicist Stephen Hawking who is a former Professor of Mathematics at the University of Cambridge and the mega bestselling author of A Brief History of Time.

In 1963, Hawking contracted motor neurone disease and was given two years to live. Despite all odds, he went on to become regarded as one of the most brilliant theoretical physicists since Albert Einstein.

For the past 50 years he has lived in a wheelchair as a quadriplegic. He cannot do anything for himself except think brilliant thoughts and speak through a computerized system.

In spite of what most people would consider insurmountable challenges and limitations, Hawking has had not one but two great loves in his life.

What belief, myth, or story are you holding onto that says you can’t have great love?

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,


Baby Steps To Love

When I am in major manifestation mode, I often like to take something that looks super big (and potentially unattainable) and break it down into 5 simple, easy things I can do every day that will bring me closer to my goal.Some times, it’s the same 5 things each day, other times I get really creative and do new and different baby steps each day.

What is useful and necessary to achieving your desired outcome, is being willing to take daily action…especially on the days when you just don’t want to!

We all know that you can’t get into shape by simply sitting on the couch watching TV. We have to get up and move our bodies.

It’s about discipline and commitment.

And, it sends a strong message to the Universe that you are open, willing and available for your dream to come true.

Here are a few suggestions of daily practices to use for manifesting a soulmate:

  • Say a daily prayer of gratitude**Talk to your soulmate – even though you haven’t met them yet in the 3D world, on the unseen planes you are already connected.
  • Spend 20-30 minutes with online dating – be visible in the great dating shopping malls of match.com or eHarmony.com
  • Practice flirting. Compliment at least 3 people everyday to start a conversation with a stranger. You are not looking to pick them up, but simply build flirting muscles!
  • Go somewhere new. Try a different coffee shop, a new path to go for a walk with your dog. Get out there – explore!
  • Ask at least one person you know if they can fix you up on a date!
  • Find a buddy to share this process with and then commit to daily or weekly check in sessions.
  • Remember, what we put our attention on grows!

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,


Love Is NOT What You Want

Neale Donald Walsch, author of the magnificent Conversations with Godseries and one of my favorite people on the planet, often sends out an inspirational message, here is a recent one I thought was especially profound:

On this day of your life, Arielle, I believe God wants you to know…

that love is not what you want, it is what you are. It is very important to not get these two confused.

If you think that love is what you want, you will go searching for it all over the place. If you think love is what you are, you will go sharing it all over the place.
The second approach will cause you to find what the searching will never reveal.

Yet you cannot give love in order to get it. Doing that is as much as saying you do not now have it. And that statement will, of course, be your reality.
No, you must give love because you have it to give.
In this will you experience your own possession of it.

For those of you who continue to have doubts that you deserve to have a soulmate, this message is a reminder to take time each day to remember and experience the love that you are.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,


P.S. To access a free interview with Neale on how to end the struggle with making life work, please visit this HERE

Full Moon Love Ritual

Rituals help awaken our spiritual self and help us to connect with our inner core, other people, nature, and everything in our world. At its core, a ritual helps us acknowledge the important moments in our life and to give these moments meaning.

Here’s a full moon love manifestation ritual to use the energies of the full moon (coming up on Thursday, November 6th). Known as the Beaver Moon, this full moon is often associated with the Hindu goddess Lakshmi who brings to us love, beauty and wealth.

To begin, I would suggest that you take a Love Bath an hour or two before the moonrise.

Surround your tub with pink or red candles and some roses.

Add a little rose oil and if you wish you can also add a few drops of:

  • Ylang Ylang – to balance your male & female energies.
  • Sandalwood -great for attracting love.
  • Jasmine – said to be a favorite of Cleopatra’s and very seductive.
  • Soak in the tub while focusing your attention on your heart and imagining the joy and fulfillment of being in the arms of your soulmate.

Then, go to the most romantic place in nature you can get to – a place that you want to someday take your soulmate to.

Plan to be there just before the moonrise time.

Bring a crystal, charm, or piece of jewelry with you to hold in your hand to charge with these full moon energies. Once charged, you can place this on your altar.

Also bring a blanket or pillow to sit on (ideally pink or red) andbring a favorite celebratory beverage and a champagne flute.

You will need a journal, a container of sea salt and a bell (if you have one).

Find a comfortable place to sit and before you sit, place your blanket or pillow on the ground and then make a wide circle around it with sea salt, then sit down.

Ground yourself by imagining your energies connecting deeply with the earth.

Write in your journal what you are most grateful for about the life you now lead, and what you are grateful for that is soon to come with the arrival of your soulmate. Then close your eyes and say a prayer of gratitude and meditate for awhile.

When you are ready, open your eyes and gaze at the moon, drawing the energy and the light of the moon into your body, mind, spirit and heart.

When you are done, pour your drink and raise a toast to your soulmate and tell him or her (in your mind) that the cosmic welcome mat is now out and you look forward to meeting them on the physical plane in the near future.

If you brought a bell, now is the time to ring it!

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,


Stuck In An Elevator with Oprah

what if I got stuck in an elevator with Oprah for 10 minutesI have a crazy imagination! Yesterday on my daily walk, I was thinking about “what if I got stuck in an elevator with Oprah for 10 minutes…what would I want to talk to her about?”

All kinds of things went through my mind, from telling her about my books and workshops (hint, hint, put me on your show) to “what’s life with Steadman really like?” “Is he your soulmate?”

As I kept pondering this, I went back to some communications training I did 30 years ago where we were taught that the first thing to do when you meet someone new (yes, I’ve met Oprah before when I was a publicist, backstage at her show, but I don’t expect her to remember me), is to get into “rapport.”

Rapport, meaning to have this person feel comfortable around you. Not in any kind of manipulative NLP way where I am going to try and sell you something, but rather in a human to human, heart to heart kind of way.

I think I would most likely tell her how much I enjoy reading about her love of her dogs and engage her in a conversation about our spiritual connection to our pets. Maybe I would even share with her that my favorite meditation is with Felix, my twenty-pound tuxedo cat. Felix and I have a daily ritual where we stare deep into each other’s eyes for several minutes and I can feel him pouring love into my soul.

In a very short amount of time, Oprah would learn two very important things about me – I love animals and I am interested in spirituality.

For those of you who are dating and meeting new people, I

know those first conversations can be awkward and difficult, so it might be wise to think about a few  openers or conversation starters you can use that will put you and your date, at ease.

Here are a few examples:

If you are a “foodie” you could ask, “what and where was the best thing you’ve ever tasted?” (Mine was a milk chocolate Pot de Crème at Slanted Door in San Francisco)

If you love travel you could ask “if time and money weren’t a factor, where would you most like to watch a sunset?” (I would have a dozen answers for this one including from a rooftop Greek restaurant in Santorini)

If you love movies ask, “which movie have you seen more than twice?” (For me that would be Legally Blonde!)

Got the idea? Plan now, so you’ll be ready to intentionally make the conversation fun and creative!

Wishing you love, laughter & magical kisses,


Everyone Gets Hurt. The Happiest People Do This…

I was talking with my good friend, Evan Marc Katz, the other day. You have heard me sing his praises many times – he’s a dating coach for smart, strong, successful women – and one of the better writers in the personal growth space. Part of the reason I continue to read his work is because he is a real, hands-on coach – he has been listening to women on the phone for three hours a day for over a decade, and he has incredible insight into what makes men tick and relationships succeed.

Well, during the course of conversation, Evan and I happened upon one of the primary reasons it’s hard to get back out there after getting hurt: the tremendous loss of confidence you suffer during a break-up. Not just confidence in your ability to choose a partner and navigate a relationship, but a loss of confidence in yourself.

When we were talking, Evan gave me an analogy that really stuck with me, that came straight from Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People”

Imagine a car salesman. He’s trying to get you to buy something from him, but the way he’s doing it is having the opposite effect:

“Um, so, I know you’re probably really busy today, but maybe, I don’t know, you might want to consider buying a Toyota Camry. Sure, it’s a little bit more expensive than other cars, and yeah, the economy is down, and yeah, you can probably get something just as good that is pre-owned. But maybe you want to test drive a Camry anyway?

No? You don’t? I kind of figured you’d say that. After all, there are tons of cars that are nicer looking, get better mileage, and have better resale value.

Wait – don’t go! I mean, you can go if you think there are any other cars you’d like better, but maybe you’d still like to buy a car from me today? I mean, I don’t take it personally if you leave – okay, that’s not true. I will take it personally if you leave, because I’m really quite desperate to sell a car this month and I haven’t had anyone buy from me in a really long time, and—“

Of course, this is a caricature of the worst car salesman ever, but the point should be clear:

Why would you buy a car from a guy who doesn’t believe in his own product?
That’s right. You wouldn’t.

The question for you – and it’s a challenging one – is this:

Do you believe in your own product?

Do you think that a man would be a fool to go out with anyone else?

Do you believe that the best men would want to commit to you?

Or do you inadvertently come across a bit like the insecure car salesman?

He’s not suggesting that you’re currently blurting out all of your own flaws or openly encouraging your dates to pursue other women.

He is suggesting that your actions may indicate the same thing.

Every second you spend with a man who mistreats you, every week you spend with a man who fails to make you feel safe, heard and understood, you are demonstrating your lack of confidence.

Without speaking a word, you’re telling him you will stay in your dissatisfying relationship and that you don’t need to be treated better.

If you had confidence that you deserved more, you’d already be out the door.

So, why would a man commit to a relationship with someone who doesn’t believe in her own product? A woman who can barely summon any confidence in herself?

That’s right. He wouldn’t.

Everyone suffers a loss of confidence after a break-up. And yet, there’s something unique about love that always makes you come back for more.

The warm feeling you get when you wake up next to him on Sunday morning.

The belly laughs you share over your inside jokes.

The strength he demonstrates in making you feel better after a bad day.

The generosity he displays with each flower, dinner, and movie ticket he buys.

But the best part of being in love – in my opinion – is the least heralded one.
What people often forget about love is how wonderfully SAFE a great relationship is.

If you’ve never experienced that safety, I’m telling you, there’s nothing quite like it.

Brian and I hope to be one of those “’til death do us part” couples. We both feel that there is nothing in the world that could break us up. Because of that, disagreements are rare. Arguments are resolved instantly. Any friction is a mere blip on the radar. All because we hold our marriage sacred and view it greater than our individual needs.

I’m attracted to Brian’s inner confidence – which has nothing to do with how much money he makes, and he’s attracted to my inner confidence – my belief in my ability to create, to persevere, to grow. The safety of our relationship allows that confidence to shine and never be shaken. And, boy, does it feel great.

Think about how you would feel to have that kind of relationship.

How relaxed. How confident. How secure.

Now if you’ve never experienced this before, I’ll admit it can sound far-fetched.

If all you know from relationships is heartbreak, confusion and frustration, talking about a man who makes you feel safe probably sounds like talking about the probability of Martians landing on Earth.

I promise you. It’s not.

Martians – I mean, men who make you feel safe – are REAL.

So where are they? And how do you find them?

This is the $64,000 question. And this is the reason Evan Marc Katz wrote his book, “Believe in Love – 7 Steps to Letting Go of the Past, Embracing the Present, and Dating with Confidence.”

In it, he walks you through 7 easy, chronological steps that he has used for over a decade to help women like you overcome your fears and frustrations in love.

  1. Let Go of the Past
  2. Set Realistic Expectations
  3. Overcome Negativity
  4. Defeat Your Fear of Failure
  5. Reframe Your False Beliefs
  6. Carry Yourself With Confidence
  7. Take Action Now

It is no exaggeration to say that “Believe in Love” is the most important book I can share with you because it’s essential to your happiness and long-term well-being.

There is no falling in love if you don’t believe in love itself.

After all…

You’ve seen men come and go.

You’ve doubted your own worthiness.

You’ve watched others get happily married.

You’ve questioned your judgment more times than you can count.

You’ve gone to therapy, talked to friends, and listened to dating gurus.

You’ve taken breaks, gotten back out there, and quit once again.

“Believe in Love” is the antidote to all of that – a program, with 17 powerful exercises that will change your tune, boost your confidence, and give you the will to create the safe relationship of your dreams.

Let me know how quickly it gets your confidence back. Oh, and Evan is being nice enough to offer it to you for$50 off of the normal retail price. All you have to do is enter the coupon code “BELIEVE” at checkout.

It’s time to believe in your own product again. Once you believe, the men you are attracted to will believe as well.

Wishing you love, laughter & magical kisses,


Inviting God Into Your Love Life

One of the most important and life-changing books I’ve ever read is “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsch. When I read it, nearly 20 years ago, I was so knocked out by the powerful, transformational content, that I picked up the phone, called information, found Neale’s phone number and called him!

When Neale answered, I thanked him profusely for writing the book. We spoke for quite awhile and he asked me what I did for a living. I explained that I was a book publicist, and he said “we should work together.” That was the start of a long friendship. Last week I had the honor of interviewing him at his retreat center in Ashland, Oregon.

One of the questions I asked him was “how does being in a love relationship help us?”

Here’s what he said:

“It creates a field that we can step into and grow to become and to experience, to declare and express, the grandest idea that we ever had about who we are. A relationship provides us with moment-to-moment, day-to day opportunities to step into that, even when the people we love become challenging. It’s the very challenge that relationship presents to us that is our grandest invitation from God. God is asking us, especially in our relationship life, a single question “What aspect of me do you choose to demonstrate now.”


That really got me thinking… in every moment, how do I want to show up for my beloved? How can I become the grandest version of myself in life and in love?

Spending that time with Neale, I felt a shift within myself…I felt my heart opening and expanding to a place of really aspiring to become a grander version of myself on all levels.

If you are curious about how to do this, in an amazing coincidence and perfect timing…it turns out that Neale has an upcoming FREE online event,
“The 3 Secrets to Ending the Struggle and Making Your Life Work.”

In it, Neale will reveal and give you a newfound understanding of a greater truth, which will enable you to live fearlessly, love unconditionally, and be happy… no matter what happens in your life! (if you can’t attend live-they’ll send you the recording!)

Wishing you love, laughter & magical kisses,


George Clooney – Why He Chose Amal

By now you already know that last week George Clooney, notorious bachelor, married Lebanese beauty Amal Alamuddin in Venice. After a long list of actresses, dancers, and waitresses, George has finally found the love of his life.

So why her? I’ve heard that she said “no” to him the first three times he asked her out. And I am guessing that dating an American actor was not on her wish list, but clearly charming George won her over.

From my outsider perspective it looks like they are a great match: both are seriously attractive, successful, and maybe most importantly, they are invested in serving global and humanitarian issues.

Here’s is a short list of some of Amal attributes:

  1. She’s a famous British human rights lawyer…who is regarded as one of the world’s leading counsels on Middle Eastern affairs.
  2. She’s represented some of the biggest names on the international stage…Wikileaks founder Julian Assange. Former Ukrainian prime minister Yulia Tymoshenko. And the King of Bahrain.
  3. She served as counsel to the United Nations on the use of drone …and as UN Special Envoy Kofi Annan’s advisor on Syria.
  4. She’s a published author…Having written numerous articles on international criminal law, Alamuddin has also edited The Law and Practice of the Special Tribunal for Lebanon.
  5. She’s also tri-lingual…Speaking English, Arabic and fluent French.

There is an old saying that “water seeks it’s own level” and that is often evident in relationships…you find people of similar education, income and attractiveness come together. In this case I think it’s just a tiny bit skewed…I think George married UP!

Wishing you love, laughter & magical kisses,


The #1 Dating Mistake

CamelcoupleClaire and I just wrapped up our Secrets to Finding True Love online Series and it was jam-packed with enlightening and useful information on manifesting a soulmate.

For those of you dating online (or willing to finally START dating online because 2 out of 5 marriages now start online) I wanted to make sure you had this very important information from dating expert Evan Marc Katz.  Evan knows that one of the most important ways you can increase your chances of finding your soulmate online has to do with thespecific way you craft your profile.

He says the key is to “show not tell,” and to understand the words you should absolutely NEVER use when describing yourself online.

Here’s an excerpt from his “Finding ‘The One’ Online: How to Attract Quality Men and Understand Male Dating Behavior” seminar:

“Show me who you are, don’t tell me who you are. Anybody can say ‘I’m friendly. I meet people wherever I go. I’m one of the nicest people ever,’ but that’s just telling me what friendly means. You need to give me an example. ‘Lunch ladies like me. I make friends with a bartender during a layover in Dallas.’ That’s the same as I’m friendly, right?

Don’t say you’re adventurous. Tell me you bungee jumped off a 300-foot bridge in New Zealand.

A profile should only be about 200 words long. You don’t want to make it a long confessional, and I think that’s one of the things that I see most with intelligent, earnest women who are looking for love.

They write something that’s straight from their heart, and it’s passionate, and it’s spiritual, and any guy reading it, his eyes are going to roll back in his head because it’s a complete expression of who she is. It’s great if she wants to attract another woman, but she’s not speaking guy language at all.

We’re not talking about tool belts and football; it’s about appreciating that what men are attracted to is often what they don’t have themselves. They’re looking for sweetness, lightness, nurturing, fun, playfulness, sexiness.

So when I have clients who sell themselves to me by giving me their core attributes on the phone and they’ll tell me that they’re ambitious and driven and tenacious and I’m like ‘I want to hire you, but that’s not why he’s going to marry you.’
So I’m not going to say you shouldn’t be those things and you can’t still be those things at work, but if you’re defining yourself as that, if you’re going to tell me the reason he should be with you is because you ran a marathon last year, unless we’re in a drought and you need to run for water, I’m not sure why that matters to him.

We’re looking to play up her core qualities. So if she tells me family is important, we’re going to throw in a line about families. If she tells me work’s important, we’re going to throw in a line about work. If she tells me travel’s important, we’re going to throw in a line about travel.

But it’s going to be balanced. It’s not going to be a whole bunch of one thing, because everybody has read an online dating profile with the scuba diving woman, right? Or the music woman and she lists her 700 favorite bands. So usually there’s something funny at the beginning, sweet and heartfelt at the end, and it’s a really quick ride in between.”

Evan had so many helpful tips for dating-I wish I’d known about them when I was single!  If you want to hear more from Evan and the other relationship experts in the series, and get access to a just added special bonus on Tapping (something I use nearly everyday to relieve emotional turmoil), click here now.

Wishing you love, laughter & magical kisses,


P.S. This is Your Last Chance to Own The Secrets to Finding True Love at 50% Off!  Don’t wait! Special Event 50% Discount ends Oct 2nd. Learn More Here.


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