Love Will Find You

The first time I met Alex Garrett, he was seven years old and chatting me up during my book signing in NY’s east village. He very articulately explained his plans to become a sports broadcaster and I quickly learned what a remarkable human being he is. Today, at age 23, he indeed works in the radio biz on AM 970 and AM 570.

 

Last year Alex was having a typical day rollerblading through New York City on his one leg, when he was photographed for the website www.HumansofNewYork.com. Jordan Farr, a fan of the site, saw Alex’s photo, read his story, tracked him down via Facebook and sent him a message saying, “I can’t even roller blade on two legs.” Intrigued, Alex wrote her back.

 

“When she responded the second time with a bubbly message and started telling me about herself, I knew that she was what I was looking for in a woman, someone who can be as open with me as I am with her.”

 

Alex arranged a meeting and discovered a woman who is ‘quirky and fun’ and says “I instantly fell in love with her.”

 

After their first date he told his friends, “Guys, this girl is truly amazing.”

 

Upon meeting Alex, Jordan’s response was, “Oh, he’s so cute and such a bad ass! (in a good way).”

 

They have now been together for nearly a year.

 

“She is my soulmate and she has it all, brains, beauty and fun,” says Alex.

 

You never know when, where, or how, you will meet your soulmate, but I promise you this: it won’t be when you are sitting at home alone on the couch watching reality TV.

 

Get out there.

 

Get visible.

 

Pay attention to the ones that are paying attention to you.

 

And remember this TRUTH I learned from my grandmother:

 

“There is a lid for every pot!”

 

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

 

Arielle

3 Ways Menopause CAN improve Your Love Life

My good friend, Ellen Dolgen, is on a mission to educate women about menopause, and today she has graciously shared with us an important message. Please enjoy!

 

Hand me a microphone, ladies! I’ve got an announcement – menopause can improve your love life!

Ellen DolgenSure, when I entered peri-menopause, I never thought I’d say that. Like many women, I was irritable, sweaty, sleepless, and felt like a permanent fog had taken over my brain. Not to mention my vagina suddenly fled to the Sahara desert. Yes, it was dry and parched! I had no idea what was happening-let alone how to get the help I needed.

I learned that what I was experiencing wasn’t just normal. It was fixable!

Here are three ways to throw your love life into high gear:

1.    Be Confident

My menopausal journey has given me the most attractive quality around: confidence. I love myself. To be the woman I want to be, both for the people I love and for myself, I have learned to put myself at the top of my To-Do List. I take care of myself with the same commitment with which I care for my family and friends!  Confidence is sexy! It has unleashed joy and a renewed sense of self and freedom.

2.   Shed Your Inhibitions

“Women always try to tame themselves as they get older, but the ones that look best are often a bit wilder. Thinking about age all the time is the biggest prison women can make for themselves,” Miuccia Prada once said. Get wild – be free and uninhibited in and out of the bedroom.Explore new places to make love – every room offers new opportunities.   Try out some new positions and sensual stimulation (candles, toys, massage oils, lingerie just to name a few). The sky is the limit! Let loose!

3.   Have A Happy Vagina

I’m not about to stay hush-hush about my vagina. It’s a beautiful part of me and as such I’ve learned to listen to my vagina.If you find that you’re all lubed up and sex is still “meh,” it’s time to find-and treat-the root cause of any pain.

Communication is the key to any healthy relationship, so don’t be embarrassed to tell your partner what you need in and out of the bedroom! Spice it up!

In fact, research published in the American Journal of Medicine shows that women’s sexual satisfaction actually tends to increase with age, even despite the hormonal throws of menopause.

When you are selfish in the sack, your partner doesn’t have to worry that you’re not enjoying yourself-he can see that you are! Be greedy and both of you will have better sex. Yes, please!

Take responsibility for your own orgasm – you are deserving of pleasure! Explore your own body and then tell your partner what feels good for you. BTW faking orgasms will guarantee that your sex life with your partner will not improve. Remember, you are deserving of pleasure, so be honest (not mean!) and you can increase your chances for a fulfilling sex life for both of you.

Ladies, it’s time to take back our bedrooms! During our menopausal years, our sex lives have so much from which they can benefit: a strong sense of self, deep relationships, and bodies we actually know how to use! “The big O” does not mean “the big Ouch.” Nip your vaginal dryness in the bud and you’ll really have something to celebrate. Recapture the rapture in bed.

 

Be sure to download Ellen’s new FREE eBook, MENOPAUSE MONDAYS: The Girlfriend’s Guide to Surviving and Thriving During Perimenopause and Menopause for more tips!

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

The One Thing Blocking You From Love (or whatever you most desire)

Have you ever tried to drive with one foot on the gas pedal and the other on the brake?

Impossible, right?

It’s the same with manifesting whatever your heart’s desire is.

When one part of you really, really has a desire, such as a soulmate, some contrary belief or thought (conscious or unconscious) can be holding you back.

It’s as if you are sending The Universe mixed messages and you end up with nothing.

The thoughts and beliefs that are the most common blocks around love include:

  • I’m afraid of getting hurt again (yes – if you fall in love with your soulmate, there will be days when you will feel “hurt” – it’s unavoidable.)
  • I’m too old, too fat, too damaged, or too something.
  • All the good ones are taken.
  • I am unlucky in love.
  • My life is already good and I don’t really need anyone.
  • I will lose my freedom.

And, there are so many more. Just having one of these thoughts can be the one thing blocking you from love.

imagesWhatever your belief, thought, or excuse is, here is what I know for sure: Sharing your life with someone who loves you, for exactly who you are, someone who supports you, and has your back, is SO WORTH IT!

Changing your beliefs and thoughts begins with managing and becoming aware of them.  When you catch yourself having a contradictory thought, stop and say “cancel, cancel” and then rewrite the script in your head.

And, if you find yourself stuck in negativity and can’t figure out how to stop the noise, find a therapist or a coach to work with.

You deserve to have love.

You deserve to have the life you desire.

And only you can make it happen.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

P.S.  Meet Me At OMEGA in NY – LAST CHANCE!
Join me for The Soulmate Secret Weekend Workshop, at Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, July 10-12th (It’s a paradise with delicious healthy food). This workshop goes way beyond the book, and includes new transformative feelingizations and a fire-ritual to kick start your love life into high gear! This stunning, holistic, rural retreat center is two hours north of NYC . More info here!

Getting Clean with Iyanla Van Zant

Iyanla Van Zant glided into the room chanting words of love and truth on a blanket of beautiful music. The crowd of more than a thousand welcomed her with a standing ovation and the fun began at the Chicago Celebrate Your Life event a few weeks ago.

IyanlaThis was my first time hearing her at a live event and she knocked my socks off. She is as funny as Jerry Seinfeld, as deep and soulfully wise as Jean Houston and as mesmerizing as Marianne Williamson.

What a treat to be in her presence!

She talked a lot about the hard work of building trust in order to build the faith necessary to manifest our good. She stressed the importance of learning to trust your self and learning to trust God.

She calls God her “Sugar Daddy!” (I love that)

Iyanla implored us to forgive ourselves for thinking we have ever done anything wrong and, in spite of bad or poor choices and decisions in the past, we must remember that we have survived.

She explained that “trust is a knowing and faith is a demonstration of what you know.”

Iyanla also shared about losing her beautiful daughter to colon cancer more than twelve years ago. In moments of grief, her daughter, who she calls an “angel of light,” sent her messages to release the “physicality” and told her “I am right here.”

She explained how the pain of losing a child never goes away but it does get easier and you can and must allow yourself to be happy.

Iyanla came to understand the meaning and purpose of the early departure of her daughter’s physical body and chose to honor her by continuing her work with essential oils, combining them with herbs that are designed to facilitate healing and restore balance to the body, mind and spirit.

She advocates cleaning and clearing how we think, what we feel, and what we believe, do, and expect by using these amazing products that are made with African black soap.

I’ve been using them and can tell you they are awesome. We all get “slimed” on a daily basis by our own thoughts and beliefs as well as being in the energy of others. With these products you can clear these energies and infuse yourself with the ability to attract goodness into your life. Check them out at www.MasterPeaceBodyWash.com

You can get your own dose of Iyanla later this year when her show, Iyanla, Fix My Life! premieres on Oprah’s OWN network September 19th.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

Celebrating 17 Years of Marriage

Arielle & BrianSeventeen years ago, on June 22, I married my soulmate, Brian, in a beautiful, magical Hindu ceremony officiated by the hugging saint, Amma.

What I didn’t know on that auspicious day could fill a book!

Leading up to the wedding, I had never given any thought as to what I kind of wife and partner I would be to him.

Having written and manifested my extensive “soulmate wish list,” I had high expectations of what was in it for me, but never really thought about what was in it for him.

Early on in our marriage I made a horrifying discovery about myself: I had no partnership skills!

Having run a business for many years, I knew how to be the “boss” but was clueless about how to be a great partner.

Fortunately, Brian spent a good part of his life playing team sports and working in collaborative business partnerships. He modeled how to “play well with others.” Over the years I’ve learned from him and became better at surfing the relationship waves.

A few of the most important things I’ve discovered are these:

  • Love and gratitude. Every day I am grateful for his love and I make sure he knows it. We all receive love differently and one of the books that made a difference for me is Gary Chapman’s, The Five Love Languages.
  • Kindness and respecting your partner are absolutely essential. I’ve learned that we will never agree on everything and respecting our differences is critical.
  • Trust. This one took me awhile but eventually I came to truly understand and know that Brian always has my best interest at heart. (and his intuition is amazing!)
  • Creative solutions are best. We decided early on to make our big decisions not based on what does Arielle want or what does Brian want, but rather what is best for the relationship. It’s amazing how looking from this perspective gives an instant solution.

This is just the tip of the iceberg. My next book (coming out the end of the year) has everything I’ve learned as a “student of love” in it.

Brian is my hero. I call him my love chakra on legs. He radiates love and kindness and when I grow up, I want to be more like him and I am excited and grateful about the next 17 years!

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

The Mantra to Manifest Love

Can you chant a mantra to manifest love? According to my friend, expert Lissa Coffey, the answer is a big yes. Below she explains exactly how to do it:

In the ancient Vedic texts, it is explained that everything is made up of sound. Sound, or vibration, is the purest form of energy. And there is no doubt that sound can affect us profoundly. Our words carry weight. We are moved by poetry, and hurt by unkind comments. The music we listen to can uplift us or give us a headache. Thunder makes us shudder. The voice of a loved one provides reassurance.

imagesMantra” translated from Sanskrit means “instrument of the mind.” Mantras are sounds made up of sacred sanskrit syllables, which when used together help to harness spiritual energy. Chanting mantras, or even merely reciting them, gives us access to our creative spirit, and brings harmony in our mind and body.

Mantras are used for various purposes, and there are many different mantras depending on exactly what you want to learn or manifest. And I have discovered a special mantra, from ancient India, that is specifically designed to help you attract a wonderful partner into your life.

In any endeavor, the results that we achieve are the result of the quality of our intentions. We need to begin our practice of using the mantra with a clear understanding of exactly what it is that we are going for. What do we want?

In the West, we tend to base our criteria for relationships on superficial values. For example, just speaking generally, men seem to want women who look good, and women seem to want men with money. Sure, we could look down the list of qualities we want in a mate and find a sense of humor, a love of family, and all those good things. But are we really defining what would satisfy the soul? The Vedic texts have a different way of placing value on a relationship, one that is meant to help us grow spiritually as individuals and as couples.

Using a mantra helps to both awaken, and to bring into balance, the Shiva and Shakti within us. At the same time, the mantra strengthens our power of attraction, it makes us like a magnet, people are drawn to us! This is another reason why we need to have a clear understanding of what we want. Our intention can’t merely be for “some rich guy” or “some beautiful girl.” When we are seeking our life partner, we are seeking someone who will respect and honor our energies, someone who will give their energy for our good in return. And we are seeking truth. From truth comes all those other great things that make a relationship last, including trust. So it is important to be clear not only in the words we say, but in the thoughts we think as well.

Here is the mantra to use when a woman seeks a man:

Sat Patim Dehi

This is pronounced: Saht Pah-teem Day-hee.

Translated this means: “Please bring me a man of truth and goodness.”

Understand that this is goodness in the highest form. Being a good person in every way.

Here is the mantra to use when a man seeks a woman:

Patneem Manoramam Dehi

This is pronounced: Paht-neem Mah-nor-a-mahm Day-hee.

It translates to “Please bring me a woman of truth and beauty.”

Understand that this is beauty in the highest sense. Beauty meaning inner beauty and goodness.

What determines the effectiveness of the mantra the most is how much devotion and concentration is behind it. Like everything else in life, we’ll get out of it what we put into it. If you are serious about your search, and have strong intention, you will want to put effort into this task.

While you can repeat your mantra anywhere, anytime of day, it is nice to set some special time aside just for the ritual of the mantra. Before beginning your practice, wash your hands, as this symbolizes purity. Imagine that the impurities of your mind are being washed away. Find a comfortable place where you can be quiet and undisturbed for awhile. If it will help you get in the mood, you may choose to sit facing the east, to light a candle, and/or to sit in a cross-legged position. Close your eyes, and concentrate on each syllable of the mantra. Mantras may be repeated either silently or out loud. Continue repeating the mantra over and over again. The repetition will bring you a deep sense of peace and joy. When you feel you are done, sit quietly for a moment, and give thanks to the Siddhas, the sages of Ancient India, for their wisdom and generosity in passing these mantras on for us to use. Then slowly open your eyes, take a few breaths, and go on with your usual activity.

It’s also a good idea to write your mantra on a piece of paper, and keep it on your bathroom mirror, so you see it in the morning. You can keep it on your refrigerator door, on the dashboard of your car, or tape it to the side of your computer monitor. This helps to keep the thought foremost in your mind.

Keep your eyes open, and your heart open – opportunities will arise and you want to be ready!

Be sure to check out Lissa’s new e-course, Dosha Mates. It’s all about Ayurveda and Relationships. You can use her Dosha system to find your perfect Dosha Match, or to enhance your current Match to be the most loving and satisfying it can be.

Find out more about Dosha Mates here!

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

P.S. SINGLE and don’t want to be? Join me for the Soulmate Secret Weekend Workshop, at Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, July 10-12th. This workshop goes beyond the book, and includes new transformative feelingizations and a fire-ritual to kick start your love life into high gear! This stunning, holistic, rural retreat center is two hours north of NYC. Get more info here!

What’s In The Way of Love?

When it comes to having more LOVE in your life, total clarity on how you desire to feel is the first step.

For those of you who are hyper focused on the “form” your love comes in, I am inviting you to shift into the “feeling space” and for just now, let go of your wish list regarding the physical form (on all levels) you think you need. (The Divine may have something in mind for you that is beyond your ability to conceive of right now.)

Here’s a little exercise to try every morning for the next week that will assist you in having and feeling more love in your life.

When you begin to wake up, before you even open your eyes, imagine that your life is filled with more love than you ever thought possible.

Using your imagination, begin to sense all the loving people in your life from soulmates to friends to family to pets (and don’t forget yourself!)

imagesIn this moment, how are you feeling?

Loved? Happy? Safe? Serene? Excited? Relieved? Filled with gratitude? Content?

Allow yourself to experience the depth of your positive emotions for all the love connections in your life.

In your mind, whisper to each of them words of love, appreciation and gratitude for all the ways they enrich your life.

You do not need to know how or when this reality came to be, just feel the deliciousness of their divine presence and breathe them in.

Thank them for the gift of sharing a life with you.

Tell them that you now know and trust that they are always with you.

Beam your love to each of them.

Put a big smile on your face, swallow the smile and let it land in every organ of your body, and when you are ready, gently open your eyes and begin your day.

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

P.S. Join me for the Soulmate Secret Weekend Workshop, at Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, July 10-12th. This workshop goes beyond the book, and includes new transformative feelingizations and a fire-ritual to kick start your love life into high gear! This stunning, holistic, rural retreat center is two hours north of NYC.  More info here!

Top 10 Ways To Have Fun This Summer

Summer funMy favorite season has arrived – Summer!

 

I love that the sun is out till past 8pm, and we can enjoy the warm breezes, and all the yummy, juicy fruit that is in season.

 

To make the most of this special time, I do extra long range planning to create memorable, special summer events that will be fun for all.

 

1) What’s summer without a picnic? Select your favorite spot in nature and plan a gourmet picnic with some of your favorite peeps and fave foods. This summer there are four Full Moons and three New Moons. The Full Moons are on June 2, July 2, July 31 and Aug. 29 and the New Moons are June 16, July 16 and August 14. Pick one of these dates to create a special manifestation ceremony and invite friends to participate in the ritual and the picnic.

 

2) Check the entertainment section of your local paper and find an outdoor concert to go to. We have tickets for the San Diego Pops by the Bay in August to see Esperanza Spaulding…can’t wait! (And with many outdoor concerts, if you can’t afford the tickets, you can always go nearby and still enjoy the music.)

 

Jumping on the beach3) Plan a beach or lake day with one person that you love talking to. Every summer my friend Margaret and I meet at La Jolla Shores Beach for our annual beach day. It’s a 20-year tradition and gives us lots of time to catch up.

 

4) 4th of July is a natural for a fun and creative gathering. Plan early and make it a night to remember with friends and family.

 

5) Make watermelon sorbet. I found a simple recipe on the internet last summer….super delicious and very easy to put together.

 

6) Finally read that one novel you’ve been thinking about. It doesn’t have to be a literary heavyweight book, just something that will bring you joy. I love mysteries and chick lit. Just finished Girl On A Train – it’s a 10!

 

7) Do at least one thing that will give you a BIG adrenalin rush. Things like a crazy, scary rollercoaster ride, bungee jumping, try the trapeze, go hang gliding, the big slide at the water park, or climb the wall at the gym!

 

8) Speaking of scary – get up close and intimate with someone (whether it’s a blind date or your mate of 30 years) by answering the 36 Questions by Dr. Arthur Aron (You can get the questions via google).

 

9) Host a movie night at your place – make it a potluck dinner and pick a genre. I love stupid funny movies like Legally Blond and Beverly Hills Chihuahua (which is surprisingly good!)

 

10) Find an ice cream truck or old fashioned ice cream parlor (take a friend or two) and eat your favorite treat from your childhood while sharing memories of your summer breaks as a kid.

 

Summer is going pass by in a flash so remember, if you do what you have always done, you will get what you have always gotten, so to make this summer different and special, make a plan today!

 

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

 

Arielle

When Life Sucks

Whether you’ve lost your job,

Been dumped by a lover,

Had a family member or friend (or you) get seriously ill,

Or someone has died…

There are days, even months or years, when life sucks.

Surviving these times with grace isn’t easy, but it is possible.

When this happens to me, the first thing I do is allow myself to feel as upset and miserable as I do.

Trying to suppress my true feelings, ignore them, or pretend they aren’t there is just a set up for more bad feelings.

Next, I share my feelings with someone I really trust. Someone who won’t automatically try to “fix” me but has enough emotional intelligence just to sit and listen and hold the space for me. Someone who can be with me in all my misery. (These are rare people, choose wisely.)

 

images

 

Then I go into research mode and look for solutions that might make the situation better or more tolerable. And, if I find solutions, I don’t try to do everything at once but rather take baby steps.

And, I also take time to chill out and give myself a break by eliminating responsibilities that can wait while I sort things out.

I take time to remember that even though things suck right now, it won’t always be this way. In fact, most of the best things that have ever happened to me were initiated or a result of the worst things that have ever happened. (Really!)

Most importantly, I make a daily gratitude list of all the good in my life.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

The Opposite of the Bucket List

We all know what a bucket list is – those lifelong dreams of things we want to experience or acquire…things we imagine are going to fulfill or exceed our expectations.

Several months ago I shared with you when I fulfilled one of my bucket list items of seeing Stevie Wonder live in concert. It was awesome, amazing, dazzling, spectacular ….everything I hoped it would be.

Bucket lists are a good thing.

I have now discovered what the opposite of a bucket list is.

Turns out that every January 1st my New Year’s Resolution list has the same items on it…year after year. Things such as:

    • Learn to speak Italian. (I can almost read an Italian menu but that’s about it)
    • Do weight training three times a week. (if I get to Pilates once a week it’s a miracle)
    • Go snow skiing.  (I haven’t been on ski’s since 1993)
    • Scuba dive the Red Sea (I haven’t been diving since 1996)
    • Cook a traditional Thanksgiving Dinner from scratch. (I’ve never cooked a turkey)
    • Take up ballroom dancing and learn the Samba. (I no longer even watch Dancing With The Stars)

I have finally realized that I will most likely never do any of these. Leaving them on my “To Do” list takes up energetic bandwidth. I have finally moved ALL these items to a new list – my F*#k It List.

Poof. Gone.  Vanished.

No more wishing, hoping, fantasizing.

The truth is, none of these are a high priority and I want to free up my mind and spirit to enjoy the things I truly have a passion for.

Now it’s time to go take a nap!

Puppy nap

 

 

 

 

 

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle



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